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Global Warming Ad

February 19, 2009
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American Whiner

February 16, 2009

The election of our new President and his more recent town hall meetings have given me a great idea for a new reality show.  It seems like every cable channel has one.  We have Dancing With the Stars, Survivor, American Idol, Celebrity Rehab and even American Loggers. So I thought why not have one that really reflects what America has become.

My idea for this new reality show was inspired by President Obama’s Florida town hall meeting last week.  Everyone there had something to complain about. Life was unfair for some reason or another. So I thought we could get a crew and hit the road and travel across the country to town hall meetings and look for contestants to participate in the new reality show American Whiner.

I would hire Michael Moore and Cindy Sheehan to be the co-hosts.  They could travel to the different cities and interview people. It would be set up just like the meet and greets the president has been doing. Like the president, we would find as many losers as possible to attend and Mike and Cindy would interview them and we could hear all their sad stories. For instance how they where forced to drop out of high school because they were expected to attend classes and forgo the booze and drugs. Then when they finally got a job at McDonalds they were expected to show up on time and that just wasn’t fair. We might hear how when their 17 year old girlfriend gave birth they were expected to help support the baby on a part time job at Mickey D’s. It’s not their fault that they are barely employable and can’t take any responsibility.

Finalist would be picked from each meeting and would be brought to Washington, DC for the finals which would be judged by Nancy Pelosi, Harry Reid, Charlie Rangel and Barney Frank. They would be scored in three categories: self pity, poor decision making and responsibility avoidance.  They would also be hooked up to heart rate and respiration monitors and those showing significant increases upon seeing pictures of the First Couple would receive extra points. Of course to really get people jazzed we would need to promise them a chance to meet the Obamassiah in person. That would be part of the grand prize. The rest of the prize would be a thousand dollars in food stamps and one way tickets for the winner and their family to Argentina.

I honestly think this would be quite entertaining, I don’t know about anyone else but I certainly enjoyed Julio Asequeda the McDonalds worker from Ft. Myers. Could he have been any more entertaining? If we have to support these people we might as well get something in return.

The Reagan Obama Debate

February 16, 2009

Our Republic’s Prognosis Is Dire

February 15, 2009

Transparent: open to public scrutiny.  That is what we were promised by Obama, Reid and Pelosi. We didn’t quite get it. What we did get were lies, obfuscation and a piece of legislation that will lead us ever closer to a fascist style government.  Our Republic has never been in this much danger. We have survived a civil war and two world wars only to surrender to a group of politicians whose idea of the perfect government is the nanny state.

The American people have turned their collective backs on everything that our founding fathers held dear. Our founders wanted a Republic where citizens had the freedom to achieve whatever their abilities allowed. All men are created equal they said and have certain God given rights that among these rights are life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. I am sure that our founders did not intend for the government to guarantee our happiness but should allow us the opportunity to gain it.

Over the past four weeks we have seen our Republic turned into a mobocracy. Princess Nancy has stated we won, get over it. Their mob rule attitude has taken away the rights of half of America. They claim to be doing what is right for our country but rush legislation through so fast that no one has time to read it. Their transparent government is about as clear as a foot thick brick wall.

Obama and company are in control and know that the only way to stay in power is to create the largest welfare state in our history.  The Democrats understand that once people become dependent on government, like a patient addicted to pain medication they will not easily come clean. These government doctors will then be assured of receiving votes from their dependent patients every election.

Our benevolent caretakers were very smart when designing this new Government “Drug” package. It was constructed as time released doses, with portions coming out over a two year period. That way during the next election cycle the “junkies” would know who to vote for so the doses would continue. Like real drug pushers, all you need to do is get the user addicted and you have them for life.

Unfortunately I believe this strategy will work because in six months if the people are still in economic pain it will be because they have not had enough medication. The Welfare HMO will then just push more medicine into the system. This will cause even more dependency and more control going to Washington.  With more control comes more power and a virtual guarantee of a significant majority in future elections.

With the 2010 elections past the prognosis for our country’s freedom will look even gloomier.  The cancer that had affected our ability for self responsibility will have metastasized to our free speech centers in the right side of our brain, thus eliminating most of talk radio. Shortly after that it will spread to our self defense node of the brain and we will give up our right to bear arms. Finally the area of our brain where we make our moral decisions will be attacked and we will find polygamy, every type of abortion and euthanasia of the elderly and disabled the right thing to do.  At that point the only medical course of action will be to put us into a drug induced coma and that will herald the end of what once was a great Republic.

Peanut Corp. President Should Be Charged With Murder

February 13, 2009

Peanut Corp. president Stewart Parnell needs to be taken to task for his disregard for the safety of the American public. This man is the reason why people think all capitalist are evil. It is people like Mr. Parnell that cause government officials to overstep the bounds of government regulations. Because of this SOB congress will waste time and taxpayer money writing new legislation. This legislation will end up being ignored by the bureaucrats and businesses and will therefore not make Americans any safer.

I am sure over the next several months we will see and hear our representative’s outrage over this tragic event. They will bloviate endlessly and nothing will really change. However, there is something that could be done which would cost very little in the long run but would make others think twice before endangering their customers.

From where I stand Mr. Parnell is responsible for the deaths of nine innocent people, in my book that equates to mass murder. He should be brought to trial on multiple murder charges and if found guilty sentenced to death. Whether he is found guilty or not it would certainly make others think about what is more important, profit or a customer’s safety.

Excuse Me, Where’s The Air Sickness Bag?

February 12, 2009

After watching much of President Obama’s Florida town hall meeting and downing half a bottle of Pepto Bismal I got to thinking.  Should I pack my bags now or wait awhile? Because if these are the type of people that are allowed to elect our government officials we are without hope.  It is obvious that not a single one of these brilliant Floridians have a clue what our Constitution states. They probably don’t even know the difference between the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence.  If they had a clue they wouldn’t be asking for everything under the sun including the kitchen sink or the whole kitchen for that matter. From what I could see there were two types of people at this town hall the losers and the whiners.

For the losers we have a great representative a supposed college student who practically has an orgasm when Obama calls on him. I almost threw up before he was half way through his question.  What the frak is wrong with this guy. This was the most excited he has been since he got his PS3 for Christmas? Good god get a life! What would you expect from someone who works at McDonalds for four and a half years and is still not in management there. Mickey D’s is supposed to be a starter job for most people. Be a man and get yourself some skills and go out and find a real job or at least get into their management training program. Listen pal from what I can see you are a loser and will continue to be one for the rest of your life.  It will be up to society to continue to bail your ass out till the day you die.

As for the whiners there were plenty of them. They had intelligent questions for people who don’t know what’s in the Constitution. Everyone wanted to know what the government was going to do for them.  Can you fix it so I can get a better loan rate? How much more money are you going to give the schools? How are you going to improve health care?

Don’t these people realize that its the government that has caused most of these problems? Obviously not, otherwise they wouldn’t be looking for government to fix them. When in anyones lifetime has government ever done anything right when it comes to managing businesses? It passes regulations that cause one problem then pass another law to fix the first problem and on and on it goes. Unfortunately politicians do not grasp the idea of unintended consequences.

Schools not working throw more money at them. We have doubled education spending over the last decade and a half with the result of no gain in achievement scores. So what do they do but put a crap load more education spending in the stimulus bill.  They force banks to give mortgages to unqualified home buyers and when they default what does the government do, give more money to the banks to redo the bad mortgages. Not enough people out of work, lets provide more welfare benefits to encourage more people to stay at home. Don’t reward bad behavior, didn’t your mother ever teach you that? Health care too expensive, lets introduce more regulations, that will reduce costs.  To many businesses leaving the country, well lets penalize them with higher taxes, that will encourage them to stay.  Not able to sell your products overseas, place higher tariffs on imports which of course will entice other countries to buy more US products.

Albert Einstein once said “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting the same results.” I guess that pretty much describes the DC crowd. Either that or they  know a good thing when they see it, just keep the electorate fat, stupid, lazy and dependent and the pols have got it made.

Imagine Spot 1 – Super Bowl Ad NBC Rejected

February 11, 2009